Sleep.

Sleep.

To sleep or not to sleep.  

Just let me sleep.  

Why don't you sleep on it.  

Sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep.  Ever so quiet and not a peep.  

I swear to everything up and down that sleep is the hardest part about having a baby.  Just when you think it's good and golden, and everyone has gotten used to their pillows and the silent stars in the sky twinkle and smile-- just when you feel like you've made it--  

--it's all crashed to pieces again.  There's a tooth or a tummy ache.  There's too much napping during the day, or not enough. Or there's just some sort of separation despair that comes and goes--- 

Her little brain is growing.  I can tell that she understands almost every word I say.  And she's walking-running everywhere.  

Here little body and mind is buzzing like crazy with all of this growth, and with all of these little electric wave-lazers shooting this way and that, it's no wonder really that she can't settle down for a solid nights rest.  

But man oh man.  Sleep.  I pray every night for a stretch that's longer than two hours.  

When I'm finally sleeping I dream of having even more sleep.  

Then it's morning, and I tell myself that it's only 13 more hours until the kids are in bed again (bless their tiny beautiful little hearts)-- and then I can get into my pajamas and bathrobe and try once more to have an easy sleepy night.  

Someday sleep will return to this household and someday I will stop accidentally putting the cream cheese away in the cupboard.