Friday, March 29, 2013

Four tomorrow

Four is so big.  Really, so much bigger than three.  And what's so crazy is that it seems like it was not yesterday, but maybe just last Tuesday that we were flying home from India and she was turning two.

Four climbs trees.  Four is sassy with these twirked and questioning expressions.  
Four is wanting to help with every single thing.  Making pancakes, digging flower holes, feeding the animals.  

----

I remember so well when you couldn't hold your head up; when you couldn't chew a bean.  
And now you are asking for more chutney at the dinner table, and we're giving you a bike to learn to ride.  



You are so independent with strong opinions about coats and teeth brushing, and you drive me crazy when you holler about the bath-- both getting in and getting out, giant protests.  

But mostly you are my snow day, and I love you more than I ever thought I could love anything.  

Sleep well, Violet.  Tomorrow you are four, and four is so big.  



Thursday, March 14, 2013

All of the Good.

One year ago my job was a mess.
And I hadn't exercised in 7 years.
And I was having severe stomach pains and migraines, completely unaware of what was causing them.    
And we were making plans to move to Kansas.  
I was depressed.  

I am not joking.  
That was one year ago, almost exactly to the date.  

I don't think we stop often enough to realize and recognize the good that has happened in life.  And today I just can't help but sit here, almost in near shock, as I think about everything that was going on a year ago-- 

--and now where we are today.  


It seems like it's all very sudden--  until I realize how crazy hard the past year has been.  It has been a year of settling ourselves-- mind, body, and soul....  and working our booties off to get ourselves together.  
And now, officially, with my husband (the newly made Professor Sprague), we get to call Seattle our forever home.

Do you know what that means?  It means the world.  It means I get to wrap myself in the amazing community of friends we've made here over the last several years, and hug you all and tell you that we get to watch our kids grow up together.  It means I don't have to figure out how to participate in this beautiful business painting shoes from 8 states away.  It means that we maybe eventually might possibly move out of our tiny apartment, and find a little house and buy a paddle boat for the summer evenings.  And adopt a dog, and have backyard birthday parties.  
It means I get to watch Tyler do what he was put on this earth to do.  And I get to dream of a real studio space that is larger than a computer desk.  

I am in love with my job.  I am in love with this city.  I am in love with our YMCA and the way it has made me feel alive in my own skin again, especially through these stressful months of uncertainty and medical issues (especially recently).   
Mostly, this week, I am in love with my husband who has spent the last 6 years pursuing his dream of becoming a professor at the University of Washington.  He never gave up.  And now, after so many years of worry-stress-uncertainty, we get to breathe, and plant our feet into the ground.
Afternoon champagne??  Yes please!   

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Waiting for Spring

Thank goodness spring comes.  Every year.  
Something consistent is needed right now.  
What joy to see the tiny turned up noses
of the flower bulbs from fall 
just sniffing the air, ever so slightly out of the ground this past week.  
As if testing and asking the question 
is it safe to come out yet?  
Yes, by all means.  Yes.  Come fast.  
We are so very ready for winter to finally end. 
Come by bike, by train, by bus-- 
Use the trail 
we live right near the bakery.  
We are watching out the window 
we are keeping on our porch light.  
We are ready.  Come on in.
Don't even bother taking off your boots.  
Sit down, that chair is fine.  I have lots to tell you. So much took place while you were sleeping.  
  




Friday, March 1, 2013

March 1st

The 1st of March, and I had the most wonderful day with Violet.
I'm not sure where this enchanting day came from; it was like waking up, and seeing snow.  How did it come so quietly without my knowing?
We went to the thrift store and found a huge sack of play jewelry for $2.  We potatoed on the couch with our lady cat (Pigeon), and watched cartoons.  She told me that we were going to have soup and corn, and grapefruit for lunch.  And so we did.  
She hovered over my shoulder for over an hour while I tried my darnedest to assemble this wooden penguin model (also a thrift store find).  And finally she told me that it was ok, and that we should just play a game instead.
We stopped by the studio and saw Lisa and Kira, and they gave her a purple balloon, which immediately flew away once we were outside.  So then they gave her two more, and she held on with every ounce of her being onto their yellow strings.

Fridays are always funny and fun because we don't have preschool, I don't have space or time to work, there's no ballet, we don't usually go to the gym, and it usually is raining.  Sometimes the freedom of having nothing to do, even for one day a week, is a little daunting (especially with an almost-four year old).
But today was nice, and I realized two things:
1) She is turning 4 soon, which means this will be my last year with her before she is sucked into kindergarden all day (for better and for worse).  
2) I could watch her eat a grapefruit half forever.